Amsterdam or Bust

Well, there is much to tell about our holidays & how God worked in my heart during Christmas; however I will save that for my next entry when I have photos to include.

So, at the beginning of this year, I asked God that during the course of this year that he would free me from my fears. That the things I fear would not hold be back from living life as he desires me to. I told Him that I am willing to do what it takes and enter into the hard & scary places, trusting that he will provide me freedom on the other side.

In some ways this is hard for me to share, I feel so weak admitting that ”I don’t have it all together.” But do any of us really? We may appear like we do, but we all have something we are dealing with/hiding. As I was talking with a good friend the other day and expressing the importance of bring our struggles to the light that we can better expose and work through things, with others & believing God’s truth, it hit home in my life.

So, I have no idea how God is going to work in my life this year, but it seems that there is something brewing……….. I have the opportunity to go on a mission’s trip to Amsterdam in March. My initial thoughts are of excitement however then the fears of anxiety attacks & my IBS problems overwhelm me. How could I ever go to a foreign country and serve others? But if God calls me how could I not?

While I am not clear at this point if God is calling me to this or not (it has only been 3 days) I am praying about it and seeing some slight openings of doors. For instance 2 of the families over in Amsterdam are people I did ministry with during college. Also, the team that is going over there is a team from my old college, so I will know a handful of people. As well as one of my co-workers and close friends would be part of the trip too, a strong support team. There is also the hope that I may get to minister in my most passionate & gifted areas – ministering to the staff there – caring for them, providing some rest, relief & encouragement.
If you want to learn more about our church in Amsterdam (Zolder 50) check out this link. http://www.amsterdam50.nl/

So, I ask would you please pray these 3 things for me?
1.That in 2006 God would teach me how to live a life not constrained by fear.
2.I would clearly feel His prompting for me to go to Amsterdam or stay here.
3.That I would be obedient to God, despite my fears