Is it ok to be sad?

There is so much to share, so many amazing things God has been doing in my life. So many "Divine" appointments I have had and a lot of God helping me continue to overcome my fears......even small one's that I had come to see as part of my life & who I am, not fears.

For example, I have been killing spiders, and the size of spiders I have been killing is getting bigger & bigger. The other day I was in my car and a nasty spider was crawling on the inside of my car & I just took a napkin & squished it - yes especially for my sisters & parents I hope you are proud, as you were there in my younger years as I really struggled with spiders. Some may not see this as anything big, however I see it as God fulfilling His promises to me, not only in the large fears I face, but also the seemingly small ones.

Another cool fear he has broken for me, and I laugh as I right this, but......not plugging my nose when I swim under water (fearing I would drown if not). I have all my life wanted to be able to swim under water with out plugging my nose & tried & tried, but never could. Well, the crazy thing is the other week at the pool I tried it a few times & I can do it.

Now some of you may be thinking I have gone crazy, however I believe that God is providing me freedom in these small areas of fear as well as the large ones. How cool is God that he loves us in all these ways!

So, what is going on with me today?? Well, God is trying to teach me that it is ok to be sad. I am now understanding why this is something I struggle with so much, but yet still have a hard time thinking that being sad is a bad thing.

Why you may ask am I sad? Well, I feel like my last 2 years have constantly been a time of say good-bye to people & here I am again. My former boss is leaving GCM to go back and practice law. He and his family are moving to Indianapolis. Over the last 2 years going through a lot of hardships at our office, working closely with him, and getting to know his family, it is affecting me more than I thought it would.

I am sad, but is it ok? My role in life has always been to make people happy, encourage & get a smile out of them. So, yes, I know it is ok, but are other people ok with me being sad?

Which brings me back to the thing God has been trying to get me to believe for the last year.....................that I am enough.......not what I do, who I encourage, how my attitude is, just me....where I am at....how I honestly feel....that is enough........... but why can't I believe that? -

-c-
p.s. the photo is of Aaron & Abi - 2 of my bosses kids - this is from a recent even we had at H20.

The Handsomest Hubby in the World!!